How to Cope with ‘New Puppy Overwhelm’

If your excitement about getting a gorgeous new pet has turned to despair…know you’re not alone!

A new study has found that HALF of puppy owners get the “puppy blues” and report feeling significant negative feelings such as anxiety, frustration and weariness in the early weeks of their pup’s life.

I can back this data up with personal observations from the clients I work with – so many new pet owners have moments where they become overwhelmed and exhausted by raising their pup. Many even wonder if they’ve made the right decision. It’s an incredibly common experience – those early weeks can be seriously full on.

But simply knowing you’re not alone isn’t going to be enough to help you feel better, so let’s look at some things you CAN do to survive this time and actually start enjoying your pet again.

1. Remember…your pet is not broken
   A big cause of the overwhelm I see from people I work with, stems from concern that their puppy is naughtier than normal, not progressing or that they have failed their pup in some way. When you’re dealing with broken sleep, constant painful biting, hyperactivity and destructive behaviour, it can be easy to despair and feel like there’s something wrong with your pup or something wrong with the way you’re raising them. It might feel like they’re going to be this way forever.All of this “naughty behaviour” is NORMAL puppy behaviour, your puppy isn’t broken! This intense phase will pass, your pup will mature, and the training work you do will start to sink in eventually.

2. Don’t compare your pup to others
   As with people, pups are individual and just because your friend’s pup was a sleepy, calm delight, doesn’t mean there is something wrong with yours. Puppies all have different temperaments, and some will be naturally more “full on” than others – this can come down to breed, age, how much training your pup had before they came to you, and individual personality. Your pup may be more exhausting than another, but all pups can grow into beautifully calm and well-behaved dogs.

3. Have realistic expectations
   Puppies are like toddlers—they’re messy, full of energy, and have a short attention span. They’ll make mistakes as they learn, but with time and patience, they will grow into well-behaved dogs. Focus on small milestones instead of expecting everything to be perfect right away. And make sure you put away anything precious for the first few months!

4. Get a good set up
   Having a good set up in your home will make everything so much easier for you. A crate and play pen area for your pup is very helpful for house training, separation training, preventing destructive behaviour when you’re unable to supervise, and simply allowing you to get a bit of space from your pup without them getting into mischief. Plus, pups tend to be much less mischievous when they’re well rested, and this provides a quiet space for your pup to get plenty of rest. All of this will make having a pup much less frustrating so it well worth investing a bit of energy into getting a good set up, then teaching your pup to be happy there.

5. Focus on your bond
   Having a good bond with your pup makes everything possible and importantly, enjoyable! A well bonded pup will focus on you, respect you more and WANT to learn from you. This means less biting, and easier training. Some easy ways to bond with your pup include cuddling and contact, taking charge of resources (food, freedom, contact), play, and basic training.

6. Focus on the essentials
   It can feel like there’s a long list of things to achieve when you’re training a pup, but when it gets overwhelming it’s time to really focus on the essentials, and on the things that are going to make your life with your pup easier. As well as bonding and having a good set up as above, I suggest making socialisation your priority.  This is the one that you really can’t afford to drop the ball on. Your pup builds 80% of their social understanding during their Formative Period (2-4 months). If you don’t do enough socialisation in this time, there is a high risk of your pup becoming fearful, reactive or aggressive.  Socialise with people (of different age, race, gender), other dogs, and other species such as cats, chicken and sheep.  If you can’t manage anything else, do this.

7. Find some support
   Having a team of people you can rely on bolster you when you’re feeling ‘over it’, share in your experiences, and offer you practical advice to help you through the puppy period…is priceless. Rally your friends and family to act as your support network in the first month or two – do you have neighbours who might be able to pop in and see your pup if you’re working away from home, for example? Do friends have calm, sociable dogs that you can take your pup to meet up with? Has another friend recently raised a pup and can empathise with how you’re feeling?

8. Schedule downtime and self care
   Taking care of a puppy can be all-consuming, but don’t forget to take care of yourself, too. Set aside time each day to recharge. Whether it’s taking a quick walk, grabbing a coffee, or practising some deep breathing, self-care is essential. A relaxed owner is a better trainer, and you’ll be more patient and consistent if you’re not burnt out.

Remember…
This phase won’t last forever! Celebrate the small wins, let go of the mishaps and as much as possible, try to enjoy the cute factor.